In my line of work, I eat out a lot during the day (usually for breakfast, sometimes for lunch) and I frequent the same two haunts. But not anymore!

Sitting at the counter perusing a menu, the bus boy approached the counter to clear it of plates and coffee cups. I looked up and had to do a double-take. The bus boy was wearing a nose ring! I’ve seen relatively attractive women wearing nose rings and often wondered if they realized nose rings are for bulls and hogs. Go to any agri-fair and you’ll see ’em. Bulls and hogs being led around by the ring in their noses.

The attractive women I’ve seen wearing such rings instantly become UNATTRACTIVE. The sight of that bus boy wearing a nose ring instantly caused me to lose my appetite and I departed the restaurant.
I went to the other nearby restaurant that I frequent, and when the waitress came to my table to take my order, she smiled, opened her mouth and uttered the usual “and what can I get for you today?” I replied “Absolutely nothing!” I got up and left. The waitress had a steel ball pinned to the middle of her tongue!

Don’t these people realize that tongue studs and nose rings are unsanitary? It makes one wonder what else they’re deficient in when it comes to personal hygiene. The waitress with the tongue stud also looked as if her hair hadn’t come within two blocks of a comb or a shampoo bottle in weeks. The restaurant wasn’t a mom-and-pop place either. It was a restaurant of a national chain.

I remember a news reporter who worked at the same radio station I did. Very attractive, very bright – until the day she walked in with what appeared to be a whitehead on the side of her nose. I spoke to her about it calmly and suggested she go into the ladies room and squeeze it away because it just looked unsightly. Turns out, it was a little white pearl she had nailed into the side of her nose.
My impression of her being very attractive and very bright evaporated.

Why is it that people think pinning rings to their eyelids and noses makes them look better? Are they so stupid they dont’ realize rings are supposed to go on ear lobes? Now…that looks fashionable. It looks good.

Oh, but ask any one of ’em why they’re so intent on demeaning themselves by placing shrapnel on various parts of their body for all to see, and you get “Oh, I’m making a statement.” So, now I get it. They’re telling the world they’re idiots and have no concept of the real meaning of fashion.

Thetwo restaurants I had been frequented will have to find another customer to fill my seat. I don’t like being waited on by idiots with questionable hygiene habits when it comes to handling (my) food.

Now, if you have a comment, you can click on the “(no)comments” link below, and enter your comment pro or con.


13 Responses

  1. Uh huh. I totally agree. Wait until someone who knows you fairly well shows you the latest stud in their navel. Eeeww. Not only is the hygiene questionable, what about the pain? You know it’s got to hurt when they shoot that stud through a highly sensitive part of your anatomy. But why stop with tongue studs and nose rings, Bruce? What about the tatoos? They’re bad enough on men, but on women???? C’mon ladies, where’s your sense of pride and decency?

  2. Yeah, I plan on addressing the tattoo crap as well. What a turn off. If I was about to “bed” a woman, only to discover she’d marked up her body with (so-called) art, I’d tell her thanks, but no thanks.

  3. You want to get abused, tell a prospective employee that they can not wear any visible studs, rings, hoops, tattoos other than 2 or less studs in the ears. Who’s bring up these kids?

  4. Bruce, you’ve obviously led a sheltered life. It can be quite comfortable when you are around familiar things and quite uncomfortable when you are exposed to new and different things. Try to put aside your dislike for things that are different and look at life in general as an adventure.

    Probably the first time you went overseas, when you were in the Navy, you came across many things about the countries culture that were different from your own but somehow you were able to accept the differences. Practice putting aside your dislike for things that are different, even things you are uncomfortable with. The more you can do that, the more your life will open up, and the more you will enjoy yourself.

    There may very well be things about yourself that you feel quite comfortable with that others may dislike. Perhaps you smoke, maybe you mix soda pop with your favorite whiskey or maybe you walk a large dog. Who knows what you might do that others do not understand or appreciate.

    So, relax a little, don’t be so up tight about other people. Understand that people are different. That’s why they make chocolate AND vanilla. Above all, remember to keep smiling (make ‘em wonder what you’re up to).

  5. I have a gal friend with a small flower tattoo on her ankle it is about 1 1/2 inches. That, in my opinion is far different than shoulder to wrist “Art”. Granted they have a right to do anything they want, but when in public service the piercings should be removed and the extreme tattoo covered up.
    I like watching American Idol, one of the contestants is a good singer has the tattoo from shoulder to wrist, it is very distracting, I hope she does not lose the contest because of it.

  6. Let me get this straight. You told the girl with the white pearl on the side of her nose to go squeeze the pus out of her zit. Why does that remind me of something my mother would have done?

  7. Sounds like your mother is a remarkable woman who knew how parental guidance works. We need more women like your mother.

  8. I place body shrapnel right up there with tattooing, don’t care for it. It is time for a new fashion — internal organ piercing and tattooing. Who is the real fashion rebel? Impress your friends by sharing your complementary x-rays and surgery photos!

  9. I noticed that this is not the first time at all that you write about this topic. Why have you chosen it again?

    • Simple! When I see shrapnel hanging from someone’s face….eyelids, nose, lips, etc, it gives me heartburn to the extent NO home remedy can cure.

  10. Hello Bruce,
    I say hello because I was raised to be polite. You must have your head stuck in the sand. I got my nose pierced last year, then again this year. I don’t believe I am a foolish kid. I am a ahem 45-year old woman. I think they look very stylish. The stud rings that is. I just can’t see wearing a hoop in my nose. In some culture, it is a sign of beauty. Everytime I look at my ring in my nose, I remind myself of this. Has helped my self-esteem out tremendously.

  11. WOW! Is all I can say! I really love your blog and it’s obvious that you put a lot of hard work into it! Keep up the good work and back to writing! You’ve got me hooked now!

  12. Yes, you may use any or all material from Tidbits that you choose, and link accordingly.

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